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A Parenting Dictionary: 5 British Words We Need To Adopt

This is a post based on one I  published in March 2010, when not even my mom read my blog. Enjoy.

~

a.k.a. Dictionary for Dummies
The Parenting Dictionary

Sometimes I think North American English is limited, especially when it comes to parenting. So, since I can’t borrow Colin Firth, I’m suggesting we adopt more British words. Let’s face it, English, the language we speak, already shares a root word with England. Why not just take a few more?

Here then are some of my favourite British-isms.

Imported Word #1: Knackered

Meaning: Exhausted, beyond tired

Application: Listening to William spout Fact #48 on sharks (while Vivian uses me as her personal jungle gym) makes me knackered.

Imported Word #2: Cheeky

Meaning: Rude, insolent, smart-alec

Application: My cheeky son told me my hair looked like a fluffy puppy. No dessert for him. Ever.

Imported Word #3: Whinge

Meaning: To protest or complain, usually in a persistent manner

Application: Me: “Hey, stop whinging about picking up your 8000-piece Lego set. I don’t care if half the pieces are down the vent. Pick them up or the Vacuum Zombie is going to eat them.”

Imported Word #4: Dishy

Meaning: Attractive, beautiful, good-looking

Application: I was once dishy, but then I had kids, which meant I started spending an average of five minutes per week on my appearance. Even my twins have noticed this. “You used to be so pretty,” they croon, looking at my twelve-year-old wedding photo.

Imported Word #5: Faff About/Around

Meaning: To waste time doing unimportant things

Application: Husband: “Are you still faffing about on Facebook and Twitter?” Me: “Absolutely not. I am doing something useful, like, like, like…”

And I haven’t even mentioned snogging or knickers, but those don’t relate to parenting, only to how we became parents.

*  *  *

What have I missed? What other words we should add to the Parenting Dictionary?

Filed Under: Top 5 Fridays (or Wednesdays) Tagged With: Britishism, funny blog, funny mom, funny mom blog, humor, Ironic Mom, Leanne Shirtliffe, parenting, parenting dictionary

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. jmgoyder says

    April 12, 2012 at 4:52 am

    Good one!

    Reply
  2. Ray Meinhardt says

    April 12, 2012 at 4:54 am

    I would like to try a few of those here in Texas. I can only imagine the response I’ll get. Great post (as always).

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:06 pm

      A little British education? 😉

      Reply
  3. Kat says

    April 12, 2012 at 5:07 am

    On my own list I have ‘dodgy’ – risky, difficult or dangerous. That sums up parenting quite well.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:06 pm

      Dodgy! Great one.

      Reply
  4. sportsjim81 says

    April 12, 2012 at 5:58 am

    This was cute. Loved the last line, hilarious.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:06 pm

      Thanks, J.

      Reply
  5. patriciasands says

    April 12, 2012 at 6:05 am

    Loved it. You might want to consider “gobsmacked” too.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:06 pm

      Such a fun word to say.

      Reply
  6. Anne Honzel says

    April 12, 2012 at 6:29 am

    You winding me up? LOL!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:07 pm

      Forgot about “winding me up”!

      Reply
  7. Squid says

    April 12, 2012 at 6:33 am

    We are also at liberty to go ballistic if the nippers are having a ruck that ends up with one or both aforementioned sprogs in a right two and eight.
    While your more polite Briton still has a tendency to faff, the rest of us fart or indeed arse around on Twitter and Facebook. It’s also worth noting that, although true cockney rhyming slang has been parodied to the brink of extinction, we never miss an opportunity for a mockney double entendre, hence: “I just facebooked your mum.”

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:08 pm

      “Arsing around.” Love it.

      Great comment!

      Reply
  8. Mom says

    April 12, 2012 at 6:36 am

    Your loving mother reads all your blogs….almost!!!!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:08 pm

      Ha, Mom. I think it took me a few months to tell you that you could subscribe…

      Reply
  9. thoughtsappear says

    April 12, 2012 at 6:52 am

    Oooo…I like “cheeky.” I like to incorporate “Cheers,” “No worries,” and “queue” into my speech as much as possible. I wish I could get the British accent right.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:09 pm

      Oh. And that reminded me of “rubbish.” Also a good one. (I do not mean to imply that your comment was rubbish!)

      Reply
  10. Shawn Smucker says

    April 12, 2012 at 7:19 am

    Maile and I lived in England for four years – you’ve got a great list here. Very comprehensive. (And good addition with “gobsmacked,” Patricia.) Anyway, I liked the phrase “over the moon.” I use it sometimes. No one knows what I’m talking about.

    I also liked their profanity, but we can save that for another day.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:09 pm

      No one can swear like the Brits. It’s true. Except maybe the French…

      Reply
  11. Lisa Hall-Wilson says

    April 12, 2012 at 7:25 am

    I use cheeky all the time 😛 Sometimes, to be sneaky, I use British profanity so my kids don’t know I’m cursing. Git, is one of my personal favorites.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:09 pm

      Good one, Lisa. Can’t say I’ve ever used “git” myself. Yet…

      Reply
  12. Walter Eckland says

    April 12, 2012 at 7:42 am

    this post was Brilliant!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:10 pm

      Cheers, Walter!

      Reply
  13. Renée A. Schuls-Jacobson says

    April 12, 2012 at 8:06 am

    Walter beat me to it! 😉

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:10 pm

      🙂

      Reply
  14. gojulesgo says

    April 12, 2012 at 8:14 am

    I’m with Shawn – gobsmacked for sure! I also enjoy their use of ‘cow.’

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:11 pm

      I’m also reminded of the British version of What Not To Wear (8000x more palatable than the American version). Trinny and Susannah talked about knickers and tits all the time…

      Reply
  15. Winn says

    April 12, 2012 at 8:22 am

    Ever since Mike Meyers on SNL … “cheeky monkey” has been used a lot by me. Great post!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:12 pm

      Classic.

      Reply
  16. Annie says

    April 12, 2012 at 8:23 am

    I like “bloody”…as in “Clean your bloody room, child.”

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:12 pm

      So much more polite than “freaking” or its nastier cousin…

      Reply
  17. Marlene says

    April 12, 2012 at 10:41 am

    We like to use “belt up”, particularly in the car, as it can refer to the seatbelts, but usually is referring to them closing their mouths and being quiet for at least 10 seconds. We also loosely interpret “skiving” (skipping school) and use it for skipping out of any kind of chore or responsibility. So you may hear, “Belt up, you skiver! Excuses don’t work. Go do your chores.”

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:13 pm

      Marlene. This is a new one for me. I’m going to attempt to say “skiver” this week.

      Reply
      • lifelibertyeducation says

        April 16, 2012 at 5:59 pm

        skiving does indeed mean skipping out on any work or chore. at least in the UK it is used that way. As for the aforementioned bloody….i have experienced a telling off about it being quite rude and most people that didnt like bad language seemed to prefer freaking.

        Reply
  18. Karen Rought says

    April 12, 2012 at 10:53 am

    Loved this! “Knackered” is one of my favorites. “Bollocks” has to be another good one, and probably applicable to parenting in some way. Great timing on the post – I’ve been thinking a lot lately (mostly because I just watched 6 seasons of Doctor Who in less than 3 weeks) that I wished we could use some of their words and not get funny looks.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:14 pm

      Brit words are fun…even when you’re knackered from watching Doctor Who. 🙂

      Reply
  19. Tor Constantino, MBA (@torcon) says

    April 12, 2012 at 12:10 pm

    Capital list! Just another reason why I love faffing about this dishy blog – cheers!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:15 pm

      A brill comment!

      Reply
  20. Wendy Barron says

    April 12, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    Heh. I grew up “cheeky”, and many of the others suggested here. I think “sus(s)” is a good word – can mean “suspect” or “figure out”. As in, “You know [that childrearing challenge we’re facing]? I think I’ve got it sussed!” Or, “Don’t go near that fella in the long trench coat; he looks a bit sus to me.”

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:19 pm

      Suss! I used to say that all the time when I lived in Bangkok (all my friends were Brits, Aussies, and Kiwis).

      Reply
  21. Heather (@HomeToHeather) says

    April 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    my fav British term is ‘Bollocks’ It always cracks me up…as do you. I’m knackered from all the laughing…where’s my nap?

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:19 pm

      Time to kip!

      Reply
  22. CarrieVS says

    April 12, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    I’m quite astonished actually at all the words you poor deprived Americans apparently don’t have. I assume you have some of your own, though, that we don’t. Any particular favourites?

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:20 pm

      Hmm. Favourite? I think it’s a scarcity thing. Like goods, words are more attractive when they’re scarce, so all the American and Canadian ones don’t seem nearly so enticing.

      Reply
  23. Jenny Hansen says

    April 12, 2012 at 3:00 pm

    I’m a big fan of “squiffy” myself. I’ll never forget coming out of a pub and having my new British friend say, “I’m feeling a bit squiffy…how about you?” My response?

    “I could be squiffy…if I knew what it meant!”

    squiffy = tipsy 🙂

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:21 pm

      I haven’t been squiffy in a long, long time.

      Reply
  24. CC MacKenzie says

    April 12, 2012 at 3:13 pm

    Okay, you asked for it!

    @ Heather – yes, bollocks is occasionally written as ‘bullocks’ not the same thing at all since they belong to a bull. Hehehe.

    ‘Up the wall’ – meaning stressed out to the point of brain implosion.
    ‘Cream crackered’ – see Knackered.
    ‘Blethering Skite’ – meaning you talk too much.
    ‘Curtain twitcher’ – meaning nosy.
    ‘Long nose’ – liar.
    ‘Prime Steak’ – attractive man (in certain parts of the country)
    ‘Waffler’ – never gets to the point of the conversation.
    ‘Rubbers’ – condoms, not to be confused with erasers (!) And I’ve just realised that you must never ever use the term to children., so ignore the rubbers above too. OMG this is a post about kids.
    ‘Dodgy’ – looking furtive or up to no good.
    ‘Agro’ – as in ‘I don’t need the agro (aggravation) from you.
    ‘Brill’ – as in brilliant or wonderful.
    ‘Ace’ – see above.
    ‘Au fait’ – another French saying that’s slipped into our lingo meaning ‘I get it’ or understand.
    Gutted – upset.
    Daft – stupid often used with the word ‘bugger’ after it.
    Grub – food.
    Kip – short sleep.
    Blow me – NO – it does not mean what you think it means. It means ‘I’m surprised’ similar to ‘knock me down with a feather.’
    Cock-up – A mistake (and I can hear you lot howling from here, just say’in)
    I’m easy – meaning I don’t care.
    Knuckle sandwich – thump in the face. Do you want one?
    Porkies – to tell lies.
    Love bite – a hickey.
    Naff – uncool.
    Nitwit – twit.
    On your bike! – to F!!$% off but the polite version of.
    Pass – I don’t know.
    Put a sock in it – shut up but more polite.
    Ring – call me.
    Shambolic – chaos.
    Shirty – bad tempered.
    Nowt – nothing.
    Pants – total crap but more polite.

    That’s it. If you want more just ask I am here to serve, lol!
    Who said English was simple?

    Reply
    • Raelyn Barclay says

      April 13, 2012 at 11:19 am

      LOL, I’m hearing my grandfather as I read through your list! What’s funny is that I use a lot of these terms with my wee beasties and have had more than one teacher send a note home with, “What?”

      Reply
      • Leanne Shirtliffe says

        April 14, 2012 at 7:22 pm

        Love the list, CC! I love “gutted.” My Brit friends use it all the time.

        Reply
  25. BlurbMyEnthusiasm says

    April 12, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    Two of my favorites that I didn’t see yet are “arse” and “gob” – as in, stop being an arse and shut yer gob.
    Not you, of course, please continue these brilliant posts!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:22 pm

      Ha. “Shut your gob” is such a great phrase.

      Reply
  26. thisgalsjourney says

    April 12, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    I love that I get to use those words daily, and no one looks at me funny. 🙂

    One I use a lot now is “cross”. Another way to say angry, but sound more eloquent. “if you do that again, I’m going to be very cross.”

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:23 pm

      Cross! My kids know what that means. I have to start using it more. Especially when I’m cross.

      Yes, you get to hear these fab words (and accents) daily!

      Reply
  27. Julie Glover says

    April 12, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    Oh my goodness. I love this! Language fascinates me, and the differences between British and American English are particularly intriguing. I definitely think knackered is going into my vocabulary. Thanks.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:24 pm

      I read once that words with the “K” sound are more amusing than a synonym without. “Knackered” and “knocked up” would be evidence of that.

      Reply
      • Julie Glover says

        April 15, 2012 at 6:23 am

        How cool! Now I’ll be thinking of K words all day long and smirking. (People will wonder what I’m up to.)

        Reply
        • Leanne Shirtliffe says

          April 15, 2012 at 11:44 am

          I’m thinking of Sesame Street. “Today’s [post] has been brought to you by the letter K”

          Reply
  28. Howlin' Mad Heather says

    April 12, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    “Bloody” goes with everything, and the little chaps won’t even know you’re cussing a blue streak when you use it.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:24 pm

      Chaps!

      Reply
  29. julie gardner says

    April 12, 2012 at 7:09 pm

    How can I possibly compete with CC MacKenzie?
    Sheesh.

    I think blithering skite might be my favorite.
    For no particular reason. Except maybe I am one.

    Reply
    • CC MacKenzie says

      April 12, 2012 at 8:03 pm

      LOL, Julie.

      I’m Scottish, you might have guessed by the name. My mother used to say when I was naughty as a child – ‘ya wee scunner’ which means you’ve been naughty. Or to my sister ‘ya wee clipe’ meaning a person who tells tales on others. But I’ve got hundreds of these. The problem with me arises when I incorporate a word or phrase in my stories and I receive ‘eh?’ from people in the USA. Strangely enough readers in the UK are quite happy to read Americanisms. I suspect it’s because our TV is full of great stuff from the States.

      Reply
      • Leanne Shirtliffe says

        April 14, 2012 at 7:25 pm

        The boot and the bonnet are two others I adore.

        Reply
  30. monicastangledweb says

    April 12, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    I am fascinated by all things British, especially Colin Firth. Talk about dreamy! Thanks for the vocab lesson.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:25 pm

      Yes, I’m pursuing my degree in Firthology. I think I have Firth Class Honours.

      Reply
  31. Hillary Manaster says

    April 12, 2012 at 11:36 pm

    Having a row sounds so much more pleasant than fighting……

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:26 pm

      This is true.

      Reply
  32. Elaine says

    April 13, 2012 at 12:25 am

    I would have no idea none of these words are part of American English! I had always assumed that the world is now intertwined that the 2 “languages” are now used interchangeably except for the difference in spelling for certain words and even there the lines are getting blured.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:26 pm

      Thankfully, the differences are alive and well!

      Reply
  33. Marianne says

    April 13, 2012 at 10:18 am

    Have you seen The Importance of Being Earnest with Colin Firth? Hysterical. I highly recommend.

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:27 pm

      No, I haven’t (gasp). This is especially shocking given I’ve taught the play and have seen it live twice.

      Reply
  34. Raelyn Barclay says

    April 13, 2012 at 11:23 am

    Love comparing the two forms of English! Actually, it’s more than two if we look at all the different countries speaking English and the different dialects within them, LOL. Then add in the spellings…oy!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:27 pm

      Oy indeed!

      Reply
  35. Gemma says

    April 13, 2012 at 11:49 am

    This made me smile…I’m from England and often get strange looks if I use any of these words in Canada!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:28 pm

      Use them. Share the love and your vocabulary!

      Reply
  36. Jennifer Hanford says

    April 13, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    Fun post – I love British accents! Now I’ve learned some cool words!

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:28 pm

      The words are more fun to say in a British accent, too. 🙂

      Reply
  37. emmaburcart says

    April 13, 2012 at 4:38 pm

    My mother is British & always told me to quit being stroppy (bratty), not to be daft (stupid), and warned me against dressing like a trollop (whore) in my teen years. So I invited my friends over to laugh at her funny accent while I pointed at fruit. But banana looks the same when you write it. 🙂

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:29 pm

      Ha. Love that, Emma. And stroppy is so fun to say.

      Reply
  38. Matthew Wright says

    April 13, 2012 at 9:06 pm

    Also used in New Zealand. I’d write a longer reply but am too knackered from whinging and faffing about…

    Reply
    • Leanne Shirtliffe says

      April 14, 2012 at 7:29 pm

      I had so many Kiwi mates when I lived in Bangkok. A lot of these come from them.

      Reply
      • Matthew Wright says

        April 14, 2012 at 11:29 pm

        I had a blog post under way on Kiwi lexicon (by request from a US reader) – which I’ve re-titled to commemorate ‘faffing’. Great word.

        Bangkok’s a great place too, but for other reasons. Got a post on that coming up too. Sneak preview: cultural peasant that I am, amidst the cuisine capital of Asia, I developed a weakness for McDonalds Pork Samurai Burgers over there.

        Reply
        • Leanne Shirtliffe says

          April 15, 2012 at 11:45 am

          Ha. Do you know that after living in Bangkok for 5 years, I never went to McDonalds once? Although I do love the statue of Ronald McDonald wai-ing. I can’t wait for your posts!

          Reply
  39. Lori Dyan says

    April 14, 2012 at 6:39 am

    I love using “balls” as a swear word. I’m not sure if it’s really British, but Gwyneth uses it and she pretends to be British, so I’ll take it as fact 😉

    Reply
    • CarrieVS says

      April 14, 2012 at 2:21 pm

      I can’t promise it originated in Britain, but we certainly use it. Do Americans not?

      Reply
      • Leanne Shirtliffe says

        April 14, 2012 at 7:30 pm

        I don’t think so, Carrie. It’s hard for me to say, though. I lived overseas for 8 years, so I have trouble remembering what words are from where…

        Reply
  40. Elena Aitken says

    April 17, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    I’m a huge fan of the word ‘faff’
    I think I’ll go faff right now…

    Reply

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