The Olympics’ theme song, I Believe, has been getting a lot of airplay. Makes sense, since it’s The Winter Olympic Games and all. If you haven’t heard it, you’re clearly living in a media-deprived world, which begs the question: how are you reading this blog?
I’ve posted the shortest version I could find. Feel free to hit mute.
Hearing the mantra “I Believe” sixteen times has made me think what it is that I believe, at least in that ironic sense of parenting.
Here, then, is My Parenting Manifesto:
I believe that children are our future my present.
I believe that if I think about my children and the future that I will hyperventilate.
I believe that my children will grow up to be pre-teens who wield sarcasm like a weapon.
I believe that I will be the recipient of most of the sarcastic blows.
I believe that my kids will not be professional actors, athletes, or models.
I believe this to be a good thing.
I believe that I will like the stage where my kids can clean the bathrooms.
I believe that this stage will increase our arguments and their use of sarcasm.
I believe that my children will continue to embarrass me by misbehaving in public.
I believe that I will return the favour when they’re teenagers.
I believe my children will talk to a therapist one day about how I messed them up (possibly by blogging).
I believe that they will talk to a therapist no-matter-what, so I might as well do it anyway.
Now it’s your turn: what do you believe? What should be added to this Parenting Manifesto?