I Do Not Look Like Mater

It’s the first of my Whiteboard Wednesday Guest Posters!

I’m thrilled to introduce you to Wendy Bradford. She is a writer, wife, and New York City mama of twins plus one. She blogs with honesty, humor, and gratitude at Mama One to Three and at Huffington Post. She is also the director of social media for Mommybites. She is always caffeinated. 

Here she is with something she never thought she’d say to her kids.

I Do Not Look Like Mater

My almost-four-year-old son is smitten with the camera on my iPhone. He takes any and all opportunities to swipe the phone from the coffee table or kitchen counter or from my hand to zero in on his favorite subjects around our apartment. Lately, these include the kitchen floor tiles, yogurt containers in the recycling, and the scratched up surface of my dining table. He also loves taking pictures of us.

One evening last week, Henry and I were alone in the living room. His sisters were in their bedroom reading with my husband.

“Cheese,” Henry said to me, pointing the familiar miniature lens at my face.

“Cheese,” I said, smiling at him. I continued thumbing through the Pottery Barn catalog.

“Mommy?” My sweet little boy asked me. “Mommy?”

“Yes honey. What is it?” I didn’t look up.

“You look like Mater.”

“What?” I looked at him.

There are not many parents unfamiliar with Mater from the Disney Cars movies. But in case you’ve forgotten what Mater looks like, here he is.

“What do you mean?” I asked my darling. Sweet. Boy.

“When you open your mouth. You look like Mater.”

I replied:

Over the past couple of years, I have thought about getting those invisible braces. I am always a little self-conscious of my slightly crooked front teeth. BUT I DID NOT THINK I LOOKED LIKE MATER.

“Yes you do. In your mouth you do.”

This conversation was worse than all my years of junior high. “How does Mommy look like Mater? I do not look like Mater.”

“Mommy?”

Oh God. “Yes, Henry?”

“Can we watch Cars?”

Later when the kids were all asleep, and my husband and I were in the kitchen fixing dinner for ourselves, I looked at him, very seriously, and asked. “Do I look like Mater?”

Before he could answer, I whined, “Henry said I look like Mater.”

“Oh.” He filled a pot with water.

“I don’t look like Mater!”

He laughed. “No, I know why he said that…”

“Please tell me,” I pleaded.

“We were playing with Mr. Potato Head today. And we were putting the different teeth in place and I was saying that all the teeth are like Mater’s.”

Could I buy this? Should I buy this?

“…And Henry kept repeating that ‘teeth are like Mater.’ That’s what he meant.”

I stared at him.

“C’mon. Really.” He opened the pasta as we waited for water to boil. “You do not look like Mater.”

Satisfied, I turned to walk into the living room. I stopped and threw out my final question, “You’d tell me if I looked like Mater, right?”

~~

Your turn: 
It’s time to confess.
Which cartoon character do you resemble, in appearance or actions?

[Also, don’t forget there’s still time to enter to win $250 from Print123.com]