It’s Canadian Thanksgiving this weekend. Because we follow the metric system, our holiday comes earlier than our American neighbo(u)rs. The metric system also explains why Canada is colder than the US, why the Flames will beat the Penguins on Saturday night, and why Justin Bieber’s career will be over in 2016.
If you want to read my Thanksgiving humour column that ran in the Calgary Herald yesterday, here it is:
FIVE THINGS AN EXHAUSTED MOM IS THANKFUL FOR
In Canada, we don’t really equate Thanksgiving with shopping, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you that there’s a coupon from Buytopia where you can get 50% off at Staples. (Staples, incidentally, is the store William and Vivian shoplifted from at age 5. I frog-marched them back in and they each pulled out 5 crazy pens from their pockets and their underwear. The full story will be in my book). Anyway, if you have a pen obsession like me or my kids, click here for the coupon; it’s safer than shoplifting. And almost cheaper.
Finally, if you are inclined to leave a comment, I want to know:
what crazy things are you thankful for? what’s your office store obsession? what can you blame the metric system for?
Happy Thanksgiving, eh?!
I’m so lame! Here I’d always thought upper Canuckistan was colder because of it’s latitude, but here you are telling me it’s due to the metric system? Wow! Had no idea. Thanks for schooling me, Mrs. Shirtliffe! Now I know! And knowing is half the power!
😉
No problem. You can also blame Arizona’s latest heatwave on the US not being metric.
My office obsession is pens. I love pens. I love all the different colors of markers. It really is an obsession.
I hear you. I’ve been known to tear apart our house looking for my Uniball Deluxe Micro. Black, of course.
That’s so funny! Have a great Thanksgiving!
Thanks, Catherine.
I bet y’all actually celebrate Thanksgiving as Thanksgiving, rather than the pre-game show for Christmas. Let’s see — can we blame the metric system for global warming, stupid politicians, and plantar warts? I say yes.
Happy Thanksgiving!
P.S. I wish we would adopt metric. It just makes more sense.
Oh, office store obsession? Post-its and notebooks. I love love love notebooks and journals.
I do like the metric system. I actually wish our paper was metric too (we follow the US on paper). A4 is so much more logical than 8.5 x 11.
And moleskines. I love me some moleskines with sewn bindings. The only thing that connects me to Hemingway.
I blame the metric system for Canadians believing they are better than US’ers. Just because you have a better system of measurement doesn’t mean you are better at everything. 😉
🙂 We just have the short-guy syndrome… gotta flaunt what we have due to the big guy nearby.
That’s the best pic. Happy Thanksgiving.
Thanks, Chase. All the best to you, KAW, and kids this weekend too.
Canadians are so silly. Thanksgiving in October. What a riot. And don’t talk to me about metric. I can barely grasp the American system. Does the American system even have a name? What’s the opposite of metric? I could look it up on Wiki but I don’t care about math that much. I remember Mrs. Smith saying something about the metric system when I was 5th grade but I was staring at girls and trying to decide if I liked Ang, Lynn, or Christa more. And I didn’t measure them in metric.
We call the US System the Imperial System, which seems a bit ironic with the American Revolution and all that.
So…if I follow your logic, Americans can’t go metric because the men would be way too distracted.
Sounds about right to me.
I think the metric system would finally take off in the States if you also converted age and it ended up giving us a smaller number so we felt younger, similar to how I prefer thinking of weight in kilos because it makes me feel much thinner.
Yes. And you’re so much taller when you measure in centimetres too.
Love the picture! I am thankful for blogs that make me laugh, like yours. I don’t blame the metric system for anything, but I do blame Canada for a lot, whenever it’s convenient. Which is often. Happy Thanksgiving.
We can take the blame. Thanks for the kind words and wishes! 🙂
Love the picture.
The the image of you frog-marching the twins.
Love that you said, “The story is in my book.”
Love pens, but my real weakness? Sticky notes. All sizes and colors.
Thankful for you, my friend.
Sticky note: yes! I love lined ones, which likely reveals something not very complimentary about me. Yes, I’m starting to write my book in November. Feels good to say that!
And I’m thankful for you. 🙂
When I was six years old and sometimes went with my dad to his office on Saturdays, my favorite obsession was taking a whiff of the smelly whiteboard markers (my first drug-induced high). Even at that tender age I already wondered if those chemicals were healthy for, you know, humans.
And copying my face on the Xerox machine.
And playing with the shredder.
35 years later, I still have a fascination for shredders.
Hilarious. And yes, shredding things is therapeutic.
I actually have a favorite kind of pen: Pilot P700. Black ink. And I’m pretty thankful for them.
I don’t have kids, but that doesn’t stop me from also being grateful for drive-thru liquor stores. I’m not sure there are any by me (in NJ), but I’m just happy knowing they exist. Miraculous.
I”m pretty sure my DH uses the Pilot P500. Drive-thru liquor stores crack me up..
Love that pic! i’m thankful that you and your family are so hilarious. And more importantly that you’re my friend. Can’t wait to read your whole book. hint hint
Happy Thanksgiving.
It’s pretty much a guarantee that you and E. will be the first to read it, serially!
I am in Breckenridge and it looks like Thanksgiving in the States with the snow falling down. Do you have turkey like we do or smaller metric sized birds like Cornish game hens?
I am thankful for my new virtual friends!
I love anything that clips things together especially in bright colors!
I can blame the metric system for how high diving boards are. Sheesh!
Fun post and newspaper article!
Snow? Really? Wow. You beat us on that front, though the Rockies have some.
Yes. Blame the metric system for diving boards. Brilliant!
I’m crazy grateful for my kids and for the support my musical “Room to Grow” is getting on Kickstarter.com. As for the metric system, I’d be one of those American neighbors who don’t even get it.
That’s fab! And metric is math that makes sense.
Thankful for friends, addicted to pens, and I blame the metric system for my weight.
On behalf of all of Canada, thanks for the praise!