If you live in North American, you’re likely aware it’s Mother’s Day in 12 days, unless you’re dead. For the part of my adult life that I’ve been alive, I’ve celebrated Mother’s Day by calling my mom to apologize for getting her nothing. This is not unlike how I celebrate her birthday by not sending her dead people’s cards.
Last night, I finally filed my income tax return (Canadians file on April 30th. Correction: Stupid Canadians file on April 30th; smart Canadians file before that date). After I used both a Sharpie and a compass to scratch that chore off my to-do list, I started thinking about random stuff, like nose hair, whether or not The Onion would’ve been funny if they called it The Rutabaga, and what crafts I did for Mother’s Day back in the 70s and 80s.
I tweeted this.
Some people weighed in on their Mother’s Day crafts from yesteryear.
More recently, Vivian and William drew portraits of me and wrote poems in Kindergarten. I’ve also received popsicle stick picture frames, cards, and a bunch of other items that had a longterm layaway plan in the landfill.
Now it’s your turn:
Did you honour your mom with homemade gifts as a kid?
Do you still get your mom a present?
Did you get me a present yet?**
* I think someone should write a song inspired by my face in this shot. We’ll call it, “Shine Forehead Shine.”
**This last question is addressed to my husband, who only ever comments on one blog…that of funny man, Knox McCoy. Yup, not on his wife’s blog, but Knox’s. I admit that Knox is hilarious. And my husband uses a pseudonym to comment there (Benchclearing). Yes, I’m outing you, Mr. DH. Lululemon please.
You never disappoint, Leanne! Loved the memory hop back to the twins’ kindergarten days.
We were not a demonstrative family. At all. Ever. Must be the Pennsylvania Dutch background on my Mom’s side. Any school projects I might have brought home were likely met with a “that’s nice. Thank you. Now, go redd* up your room.”
*Redd–Attention Scrabble players: It’s in the dictionary. It means “to tidy” or some-such. You’ll thank me the next time your letter tray looks like it’s stuttering Ds.
The clearest memories I have of Mother’s Day were dinners out after church. Howard Johnsons on Route 51. Oh, yeah. Dad knew how to show Mom a good time. Of course, it was all we could afford. Mom had 4 daughters, ages 3,2,1 and newborn by the time she was 23. My youngest sister came along 4 years later. The fact that he went from farming to long-haul truck driving may have had something to do with that time lag.
I am so using “redd.” I’ll add it to my arsenal of qat, qi, and the.
My mom had two kids by the time she was 23. I thought that was bad enough!
I love it when women drink beer. Cheers, Ironic Mom Mom.
I called my mom “Ironic Mom Mom” on the phone today. 🙂
This is hilarious! Ah, in the seventies I remember giving my mom little plant seedlings. That makes me grin for some reason.
Such an earthy gift for a Kraft Pizza era!
Ceramic ashtrays! YES!!!
And a painted rock, which my parents dutifully used as a paper weight for many years until my brother threw it through the basement door in a rage. After that, all homemade gifts got shoved into a box in their closet….
Weird.
What a memory. Vivid, eh?
Thanks for reminding me! Yeah, how ridiculouos is it that I have to remind myself (a) that I have a mother and (b) that I am a mother – argh!
I just feel guilt. So I get it.
This year I’m taking my mom to NYC for Mother’s Day…it helps make up for the forgotten presents. Next year, I’ll return to crafts…macaroni crafts now that you’ve mentioned it.
Can I be your mom?
Love it Leanne – no gifts necessary, just your never-ending love and phone calls….love you!!
Awwww. Proof again that I have the best mom ever.
Globalization before the internet: The ceramic ashtray was a highly popular Mother’s Day gift in Germany as well, and the only one I remember making. Maybe because my mother chain smoked.
Ha. Good line. My mom smoked too. Until 4 days after my sister got married.
I’m not really artistic or crafty in any stretch of anyone’s drug-induced imagination and I could have proved it by my “art” projects that were my Mother’s Day gifts all through my childhood.
I say “could” because after my mother passed away and I had to clean out her stuff, I threw them all away. Every one of them. The “mug” that strangely resembled a green mutant with no brain, the macaroni necklaces, the paper-doileyed (sp?) cards, the snow-flakes with glitter and the clay whatchmacallits. She kept them all. Oy vey!
I *love* that she kept them all. That says a lot.
I remember the macaroni crafts and the paper plates and tissue paper things…vaguely… Now, what do you get the lady who has all that she already wants or needs? We usually settle for fresh flowers. You don’t have to dust them and they don’t add calories. Both of these things are appreciated!
I love fresh flowers. Just not roses. They kind of remind me of death…
I fully support your husband’s commenting habits.
Good thing I’m already in Awesometown… Can I run for mayor? Actually, that’s too much work. Can I run the local pub? The one beside the basketball court?
Ah, the 70’s – such good times. Makes me want to put the bell-bottoms on and grab a cold one from the avocado fridge. hehe
Can’t even begin to describe the nostalgia of that era. You did a great job. Did our teachers just have a run on all the kitschy stuff in the craft store?
And yet, our kids made ceramic coffee mugs – um, not usable, however; and leather coasters – um, leather and water? Interesting.
I missed the leather coasters, though I think I made some out of used Christmas cards. Also known to be highly water soluble…
The Rutabaga. Ha! Probably wouldn’t be as funny, I don’t think.
I have an idea for Babs’s present this year, but it involves taking pictures of someone else’s property. There’s nothing WRONG with doing that…right??
Just leave a slap bracelet. All will be forgiven.
I totally remember making gold-sprayed macaroni projects and covering bottles in tissue paper. The best gift I ever gave my mother was in nursery school. A tiny sapling, she planted it and it has lasted all these years – 40 years later! I’ll send her a card this year. We do b’day gifts, not gifts on Mother’s Day. Sheesh! Maybe I need to get out the gold spray-paint.
I love that the sapling still exists! Truth is, Mother’s Day was always in the middle of seeding for us wheat farmers, so my mom was always cheated. She cooked, the men came into the house to eat in shifts…
Hey, Mr. T made ashtrays with the kids at his youth center as late as 1984. As for Mom’s presents, if I make something that doesn’t go ‘kaboom’ and/or cause the smoke alarm to go off, I consider that a homemade success story.
Yes. I’d agree. If I don’t burn myself or anyone else, a craft is a success.
Leanne, I’d love to have a direct connection into your mind. I love the random thoughts you have.
My mother’s 96th birthday is the day after Mothers’ Day, so I’m baking some sugar-free brownines to take to her assisted living home for a combination party.
I sent your present a week ago. Maybe you need to check the Pony Express schedule to see why it’s not there yet.
Yes, I can go a little non sequitur at times. My brain is good at making connections. And then promptly forgetting them. It’s like Turrets in the cerebral cortex.
Oh yes, so many crafty gifts as a kid. The ashtray, naturally, but also the macaroni necklace, the pipe cleaner flowers, the painted plastic plates (anyone else?), and many pictures drawn for her. She kept most of them and used them.
My son told me he is making something for me at school and it’s a surprise. Last year, in kindergarten, they took pics of each of the kids holding this massive bouquet of sunflowers and standing in a field behind the school, and then they put their pic in a foam frame with foam cut outs decorating it. I am looking at it in my office right now. I love that thing. I can’t wait to see what he did this year!! 🙂
The homemade gifts are adorable. And I just remember placemats covered in that sticky plastic stuff. What was that called?
I ROCKED the ashtray for my mom…and even better, she still has it, and uses it. Not for smokes, but as a paper clip holder on her desk. I recall thinking with great regret as I made the thing that it was sad she didn’t smoke because she wouldn’t be able to use it properly.
My brother made one for her two years after I did. He got all fancy and made a lid, complete with the blob of clay for a handle. Too bad the handle was the slipperiest part of the thing and it got dropped all the time.
Now I’m wondering what kinds of awesome my twins are cooking up for me for Mother’s Day this year. Last year I got scrambled eggs with M and M’s sprinkled on top.
Great post!
Christi Corbett
I love the cold toast I get. Kind of. But they are so sweet when they give it to me.
Thank you for that correction 😉 smart people do file early, it gets it out of the way so it is just done and over with – although MANY people do file on the 30th and that is why people who work in the mail room and cash unit get (did I say get? well over time is nice in theory I guess) to work late on April 30th at the CRA – whoo hoo! I have friends who work in those departments for them, they inform me of these things, but hey it’s only once a year right? AND at least you filed – that is good 🙂 I love the picture of you and your mom, I wish I could take my mom for a beer on mother’s day but she lives too far away… and I don’t think she likes beer very much 😉 maybe a card and a home made ash tray will have to do! There would be something kitchy and/or hilarious (perhaps disturbing) about getting a home made ash tray from your daughter in her 30’s that she might appreciate, thanks for the great post.
Oh no wait…. speaking of 70’s nostalgia gifts.. yes, I am all about the macaroni pictures! Thank you.
What a great idea for a girls night out. Making ceramic ashtrays for your moms in 2012. I giggle at the thought. My mom, too, lives 800 miles away. This pic was taken a few weeks after Mother’s Day. 🙂
Lululemon. That is all.
*just wanted to show you that I read the fine print.
And also that I want a pair, too.
I know. They’re great!
My mother is (more than) a little OCD. My school projects always messed with her Chi and more importantly never matched her decor. The canning lid Christmas ornament with my school picture never actually made it onto the tree, the clay turtle with pencil holes “accidently” fell off the desk, and the vase covered in tissue paper and watered down paste was “perfect for the flowers that she had to take to work.” I am only slightly damaged from it all. More importantly, I am guilt free when I give her a big hug and call it good.
I made my mom a frame with noodles. She threw it away. I think this is why I have all the crap my kids make me.
Your mother and I have something in common (besides blond hair and an infectious smile. but infectious in the good way. what.)
We both want to drink with you. But I’ll have red wine, too.
Also, I never get my parents anything. For any occasion. Ever.
That’s not our way. Thank GOD.
It makes life a whole lot easier now that tie-dyed t-shirts aren’t in style anymore.
I honestly can’t think of a thing I made for my mom growing up. There must be something. Hmm…I wonder if she remembers anything?
This year we got her an iTouch (or push as she calls it) So she can Facetime with the grand kids.
Maybe that makes up for any lack of gift for the last 30 ish years. 🙂
… homemade coupon books, that I would promptly hide because I didn’t want to do the chores listed inside it..
I seem to recall some play dough concoction that my daughters made for me that I hung faithfully every year on our Christmas tree. Maybe it’s amnesia, or a blessing, but I can’t recall what homemade treasures I made for my Mom.
I am such a dick. My mother always manages to send ME Mother’s Day cards — but I never remember to do the same (she lives in the town adjacent to mine…why should I mail it when I’ll see her? But enough with the justifications…).
And then my kids make me crap that I display for a few months but then store in what I call my “treasure box” in the garage. Because it’s ugly. But because I can’t bear to part with it.
See: total dick. 😉
I remember the ’70s. Unfortunately. Being Protectionist Era New Zealand, it was just like the 50’s everywhere else, except for the disco. And the passion-pit lounge floors. And shag-pile carpets. And flares. And the Raleigh 20 bicycle I had, which I used to ride to school on.
We used to do a lot of crafts in our family home. But not for mother’s day. My mum didn’t like Mother’s Day. Still doesn’t, luckily for me as I never remember when it is…