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Activities for Children of Lousy Parents

Let’s get things straight. I’m not a Martha Stewart mother, one of those women born to parent. I am neither willing nor able to build a replica of the Taj Mahal out of items from the recycling box.

In recent weeks, I’ve felt compelled to do something slightly more interesting with my children on Sundays because they have to write in their journals at school on Monday morning.

This is how I came to the decision to get off my butt on Sunday afternoons.

At a parent-teacher conference in January, William’s kindergarten teacher remarked, “He tends to write the same thing in his journal every week. But as his confidence increases, that will change.”

William's Journal. Turn the page 6 times, and read the same thing.

Of course, I am pretty sure this repetitiveness had little to do with Will’s confidence and a lot to do with the fact that I don’t do many interesting things with my kids.

This hypothesis was confirmed when I went to Vivian’s parent-teacher conference. One look through her journal revealed that she was making a lot of things up.  Yup, my five-year-old is writing fiction and passing it off as truth. “We made cookies. They were chocolate chip,” I read. Now, although my memory of day-to-day items is sketchy, I’m pretty confident I haven’t made cookies in about 18 months. Still, no need to disclose this fact to her teacher.

Fast forward to my epiphany: if I do something vaguely interesting each Sunday, William won’t have to repeat “I went sledding on a hill” for the entire school year, and Vivian won’t have to lie.

So, I’m trying. Over the past eight weeks, we’ve built a snowman, fed the horses, gone swimming, trekked to a new playground, and rolled pizza dough. It ain’t the Taj Mahal, but it’s something.

Once again, unbeknownst to them, those little cretins are making me a better person.

Filed Under: Hilarious Family Moments, Lackluster Parenting, The Anti-Craft Tagged With: bad parenting, crafts, Martha Stewart, parenting

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. pilar says

    March 22, 2010 at 6:45 am

    hmm.. i would have liked to have some of those home-made chocolate chip cookies.

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 22, 2010 at 7:56 pm

      I do make fantastic cookies…likely because I do so rarely. Basic supply and demand economics.

      Reply
  2. Gillian says

    March 22, 2010 at 3:53 pm

    Just think, one day you and your kids can laugh about things like this over a bottle of wine. 😉

    Great blog! I just awarded you 2 blog awards. You can see them on my site.

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 22, 2010 at 7:57 pm

      Yes, I think we will laugh at this. Thanks for the awards! I will check out your site…

      Reply
  3. Diane J. says

    March 22, 2010 at 9:39 pm

    Oh the writings will get better, hee, hee, hee. My kids wish they could write about sledding every day. My twins (boys, 9) are so into writing that they sit side-by-side and discuss what is going to happen in each other’s “books”. Today Twin A looked over Twin B’s book and said, “Oh, we’re doing a chapter book.” Hmm, okay, if you say so. 🙂

    I stumbled upon your blog and just love it, have a great day.

    Reply
  4. ironicmom says

    March 23, 2010 at 5:30 am

    Thanks, Diane. I am amazed (and cautiously optimistic) that your boys write books. I can dream!

    Reply
  5. Sabreena says

    March 23, 2010 at 10:03 am

    Boy, I never even thought about the day my lack of parenting would make itself public. My son starts preschool this September so I still have time before he can write but this gave me something to start thinking about. I am going to have to start teaching them story telling.

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 23, 2010 at 6:51 pm

      You got it: I recommend fiction.

      Reply
  6. Theta Mom says

    March 23, 2010 at 10:09 am

    I can’t wait until I read the stuff my 4 year-old will soon write! LOL

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 23, 2010 at 6:51 pm

      There’s tons of blog-fodder around the corner for you!

      Reply
  7. Crystal & Co says

    March 23, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    How funny!

    We have five boys…. the oldest two are school age.

    Not only do I wonder what they write in their journals (i.e: my mother is emotionally unstable and threatened to sell us on ebay, should we be scared?) but I worry about the things they will repeat OUT LOUD. Phone calls from the teachers are always fun! Let me interject and say I am half joking and half serious. The oldest two are 9 and 11…. they know I would never sell them, even if I say it outloud in the mist of breaking up a fight over bikes, scooters and bedroom territory fights!

    Anyway, found your funny blog playing the six degrees of blogging. Check out the rules of play here- http://www.workwifemomlife.com/2010/03/six-degrees.html. Then, then check out my blog where I will post about you!

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 23, 2010 at 6:55 pm

      I am borrowing the phrase, “I’m going to sell you on ebay.” Brilliant. My hat goes off to you with five boys. And I am definitely going to play 6-degrees-of-blogging. Thanks!

      Reply
  8. Dolly says

    March 23, 2010 at 2:53 pm

    I LOVE reading your blogs! You have a great sense of humor (how could we get through this thing called parenthood without it!). I can see that you and I are going to get along great! Thanks for the laughs!

    Reply
    • ironicmom says

      March 23, 2010 at 6:55 pm

      Yes, I think humour has saved many lives…Thanks for the kudos!

      Reply

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