It’s my fifth annual list of the Worst Toys of the Year. I wish my job of selecting these was getting harder, but it remains as easy as making fun of a Kardashian. Here, then, are the Top 7 Worst Toys of 2014: [soliloquy id=”7846″] What do you think? What are this year’s worthy toys? horrific […]
Worst Toy List
The Worst Toys of 2013 ~ The Skankification Award
Welcome to my fourth-annual list of the Worst Toys of the Year. Why create a list of toys that suck? Because shopping makes me want to bang my empty-cart-that-can’t-steer into other people’s full carts Because cheap, loud toys make me want to hammer-throw them off my back deck Because writing something funny is more therapeutic […]
The Elf on the Shelf…and Hate Mail
If you don’t know what the Elf on the Shelf is, you’re missing out on one of the self-publishing miracles of the decade. At the request of CBC Radio, I weighed in on this toy. Not surprisingly, I situated myself in the Grinch-y corner. Here’s the link to my five-minute radio spot that I did […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Noisy Award
Well, we’ve made it to the final award in my list of The Worst Toys of 2012. The final presentation is The Noisy Award. This award goes to the toy a parent is most likely to (a) yank the batteries out on Boxing Day, (b) drive over it with a zamboni on New Year’s, or […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Gross Award
Welcome to the eighth installment and the penultimate post of The Worst Toys of 2012. Today, I am giving out The Gross Award. This stomach-turning award is given to a toy that would give a toddler or a great-grandparent nightmares. It gives me near-sadistic pleasure to present the 2012 Gross Award to The Walking Dead […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Gullible Award
Welcome to the 7th installment of the Worst Toys of 2012. Today, I bring you The Gullible Award. This award honors the shrewdness of marketers and “dishonors” those of us who buy the item. Without further delay, then, the 2012 Gullible Award goes to The Logo Board Game. Here are 5 reasons why the Logo […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Child-in-Tears Award
Welcome to the 6th installment of the Worst Toys of 2012. Today, I am bringing you the Child-in-Tears Award. This prestigious honor goes to the toy that is most likely to solicit some good sobs, not unlike the time I gifted a bouncy cobra in a wicker basket to my seven-year-old nephew. After he leaped […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Plastification Award
Welcome to the 5th installment of the Worst Toys of 2012. If you missed the previous “winners,” please check out the following: The Skankification Award The “Call 911” Award The Surrogate Parent Award The What-Is-It Award Today, I am giving out the Plastification Award. The Plastification Award is given to a toy that uses a […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The What-Is-It Award
Welcome to the fourth installment in the series of the Worst Toys of 2012. If you missed the first three, check out the Laugh & Learn Apptivity Monkey, the Razor E100 Electric Scooter, and Ari Roma, the Novi Star prostitute doll. Today, I am giving out the What-Is-It Award. This honor goes to a toy that is […]
The Worst Toys of 2012: The Surrogate Parent Award
Welcome to the third installment of the Worst Toys of 2012. So far, we’ve given out the “Call 911” Award and the Skankification Award. Today, it’s time for the Surrogate Parent Award. The Surrogate Parent Award goes to the toy that is designed to entertain your child for the length of time it would take […]