Sometimes it’s the simple stuff. I’m not talking about foot rubs or walks on the beach or other centerfold “likes” (though I could if you want me to). I’m talking about simple words. Specifically, what comes spewing of my mouth. The other day, William remarked to his father: “Dad! We love mommy. We don’t like […]
Whiteboard Wednesday
Daughters, Bad Breath, and Losing It
I’m pleased to bring you my first ever Whiteboard Wednesday Guest Post. Chad Jones is a hilarious dad of two who I suspect sticks his foot in his mouth nearly as often as I do. He blogs about the bizarre (and slightly-less-bizarre) aspects of faith as well as being both a dad and husband. The […]
Children in Cages
I’m sitting on our couch after work, one of those long days when 89% of my brain has already been sacrificed to middle school students. William is doing what he does best: babble incessantly about a fantasy world as though it’s more natural than Pamela Anderson’s breasts. Which it is. Will is holding his latest […]
Wit and Women and a Husband
Last night I went to my first Wit and Women class (and if anyone wants to suggest it should be Wit or Women, I will photocopy your face 66 times while I sit on the copier’s lid). I will blog more about this adventure soon. Let’s just say it’s a great program that makes me […]
Happy Make-More-Work-for-Mommy Day
. It’s bedtime. I’ve spent the past sixty minutes doing the following: sorting through kids’ dresser drawers and replacing summer tees with winter hoodies; hooking up lonesome socks congregating in a singles’ drawer; picking up books that have been flung by discus athletes-in-training; and removing embedded Lego pieces from my bare feet. A typical evening. […]
Did I Say That Out Loud? How To Embarrass Your Kids
Sometimes I think sitting down as a family at dinner is overrated. At least for the mother. I miss my university days of having a bagel and Sunchips in front of the TV with my roommate while watching Jeopardy and reruns of The Muppets. Now, in our Lego filled house, dinner table conversations sometimes seem […]
The Return of Whiteboard Wednesday
Today marks the return of Whiteboard Wednesdays. If you have no idea what this is, neither do my kids. So know that you’re not alone. Basically, Whiteboard Wednesday is when I write down something semi-idiotic that I said while parenting in the past week. This is easier than it seems. Some past Whiteboard Wednesday comments […]
Joke Telling and Kids
I love how kids tell jokes. It’s chaos theory at its best. From my unscientific observations, there are two initial stages of kids’ lack of development with regard to joke telling. Stage One: The Surreal Phase In the surreal phase, kids will tell jokes greatly influenced by the postmodern movement. These jokes tend to follow […]
When 6 Year Olds Discuss Dead Animals
Mealtime with twins is generally entertaining. If they’re not demonstrating how saliva aids the digestive process, they’re partaking in accidental slapstick by falling off chairs mid-story. Last night, though, it was a conversation in two parts that garnered my attention. Part One Setting: Before dinner. I have just announced we’re having hamburgers for dinner. William […]
What 6-year-old Twins Think of Their Mother
I took myself out for lunch on Mother’s Day. I took my children, too, since my husband had to work. Because I had dreams of a grown-up lunch, the restaurant I chose wasn’t a place that had a children’s menu or a tablecloth you could draw on. As a result, I was stuck entertaining my […]